I hope you enjoy the fact that it no longer has wheels as much as I have.
I hope you don't let the fact that the clamps on the lid no longer work bother you
I hope you will use it, and you didn't just take it for a ride and junk it somewhere.
I hope you realize that I still used it because I didn't want to see it in a landfill.
I hope that even though the garbage men (sorry sanitation engineers) emptied it, there was still a bag of Missy poo in it when you loaded it into your vehicle.
No, it's not a poem. It happened yesterday between 7:30 and 8:30. And in case you're thinking, no it didn't blow away, and no, the garbage men (well, they're all men and it's my blog. I don't have to be pc all the time) didn't take it because they thought it too was garbage. It wasn't that bad looking, just pathetic. You can tell I'm a little cross about this, can't you?
Should I personalize my next garbage can so no one will dare steal it? What should I put on it? Should I start a business doing personalized garbage cans? Jess, you're kind arty.
I'm cross; answer question 2 in the above paragraph, and it's sure to cheer me up.
Happy Anniversary
My Loves
Vincent Murphy
Central New York
Rocks!
Spring
Come On!
Awwwwww
I miss my Missy
Better Days
they'll come again
Alicia Vida Billman
is 29 today
This says it all!
Friday noon, you're coming home with me Vinny.
Vincent Murphy?
What!?
Tuesday nights
are gonna change in May
Mr. Murphy
waiting for his haircut
When I get bored
I take pictures of myself in bathrooms
Graphic Boulevard
blown transformers and a tree
Cars in Bergenfield
didn't do well
House on Queen St
with a for sale sign in front of it
Bergenfield
Storm 2010
Vincent Murphy
and his look alike Bob Murphy
Off my back porch
Don't worry I didn't take this pic while falling
Down Kellogg Street
Up Kellogg Street
My house, our cars
Winter 2010
Summer!
I want summer back!
Obviously, your trash can should have beautifully legible letters spelling out "Fuck the patriarchy". Then wait to see how long before the Clinton town police show up to give you a citation.
ReplyDeletepaint "you'll never find the rest of him" on it.
ReplyDeletedon't bother starting a business, just start leaving them around. :-)
i had friends whose adirondack chairs were stolen despite the fact that their last name was painted on the back in huge letters. garbage can burglary is somehow more disturbing.
ReplyDeleteI think you should sell advertising space on your garbage can. This garbage can has been brought to you by....
ReplyDeleteThey would pay for themselves and continue advertising even after they are stolen. the ultimate value for your clients.
OR
Just for fun (because sanitation engineers need a brighter day too) you could get 3 garbage cans: on each you would paint a big bold # 1, 2 and 3.
The trick will be to only put garbage in ONE of the cans each day... sort of like a little guessing game that the garbage people can play when they come to your house.
I'd say you should paint the background midnight purple with a circus red trim and then paint on some random mystic symbols like question marks and swirlies to give it a little extra dazzle.